The next contemporary Bible translation

In an e-mail about serious but uplifting matters, Kristor wrote:

For the Christian, hope literally springs eternal. Ha ha! How delightful! For the Christian hope is literal in every sense of that word. It is hope that springs literally—i.e., “actually,” and “verily,” which is how modern Americans use “literally” in colloquial speech.

I replied:

Hmm, maybe in the next “Contemporary American English Version” of the Bible, Jesus’ repeated phrase in the Gospel of John, “Verily, verily, I say unto you…” will be rendered as:

“Literally, literally, I say unto you … ”

It will be popularly known as the Speaker Gingrich Bible.

Kristor replied:

LOL! And the next version of the Book of Common Prayer can end the Gloria Patri with, “As it was in the beginning, is now, and ever shall be, world without end. Literally.”

- end of initial entry -

Kristor writes:

Then there’s the Surfer Dude’s Bible: “Totally, totally, I say unto you…. ” “As it was in the beginning, is now and ever shall be, world without end. For sure.”

Kristor continues:

You wrote: “The next contemporary Bible translation.”

Didn’t you mean, “The Newt Intergalactic Version”?

LA writes:

After turning the “verily, verily” of the King James Version into the “literally, literally” of the Speaker Gingrich Version, I realized that there is another connection between the “verily, verily” of Jesus and Gingrich’s own speech patterns. It is that Gingrich himself constantly says, “very, very,” as in, “I think this is very, very important,” or, “I want to be very, very clear about this.” Now Jesus’ “verily, verily” in the King James is eloquent and powerful, indeed it is the way the God man introduces his statements of divine truth; while Gingrich’s constant gaseous indulgence in “very, very” evidences an appalling tone-deafness to our language and shows the operation of a bloated human ego which is the very (pun not intended) opposite of truth. But it is funny that there was this additional parallel between them.

Posted by Lawrence Auster at February 13, 2012 06:45 PM | Send

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